Apr 22, 2013
When we "tuck away" old knowledge from school at the end of the year and forget about it, is that the same neural reaction as would happen with a traumatic experience? In that respect, would remembering something taught from school after years of never needing to use it, be akin to a Vietnam flashback? Might need to ask a neurologist about it.
Mar 24, 2013
Let's Play: Final Fantasy V Spoof (part 4)
Welcome to yet again another installment. (Who says I give up on these things?) This one is yet more combat-heavy, but hopefully my Winning Strategies won't have you all up in arms. I'm actually told they're quite hilarious in and of themselves, so I almost wonder if I wasn't destined to LP this hack in the first place. Ah well, it gives me something to do over spring break, I suppose. Anyhow...
Chapter the Fourth: That All Changed When The Fire Nation Attacked
At the end of the previous installment, we had just attempted to vaporize ourselves with a meteor teleport, and wound up...somewhere.
Well, I've got no freakin' clue where this is, so it's time to try out this World Map that Galuf was so fired up about.
Um...okay? I really kind of wish this thing were a little larger, or perhaps had some labels on it that are more visible than the blinking white dots, but at least I'm able to figure out a vague location somewhere to the northwest. We're not in Tycoon anymore, that's for sure. ...wait, where the hell's Tycoon on this map?
Some wandering about leads me to Karnak, the Kingdom of Fire (and totally not the city in Egypt).
And boy, oh boy, does Karnak take its fire seriously.
There is something massively wrong with this town.
Well, time to do what we do at every other place and shop for--
Well, crap. I didn't know buying armor was illegal. Were I a bit younger, I'd probably assume this was the "bad" ending, but a while later of mashing the A button against every wall in my cell results in this creepy old guy with glasses blowing up a wall.
This hack has some strange obsession with death, and the self-administration of such therein. Evidently the party thinks so, too, as they bust out laughing in front of him.
Thank you for that wholly enlightening science lesson, Professor.
Finally, someone notices.
Of course! It all comes back to them! (note: the opinions expressed in this article do not necessarily represent the actual feelings of the author. I hate politics, I really do. =P)
Stilton shows Cid a glowing blue thing.
Our conversation is interrupted by the Minister appearing.
As is typical.
Well, before we go meet Cid, we should go explore the rest of the town that we didn't have the chance to look at before being so rudely arrested.
Uh-oh. But it turns out that's the least of Karnak's problems...
I didn't mean this guy.
...Or this guy.
Enough of this Karnak Castle malarkey. Off to the Steamship!
A convenient excuse.
Always with the monsters.
This comes to mind.
So does this.
Riding conveyor belts is fun and all, but it all has to end eventually, and we have to stop Queen Karnak from stealing Cid's stash, so here we go!
I know, right?
Well, time to do battle!
This battle's not nearly as much of a pain as HeavyP was. I did get my ass kicked maybe once, because I got impatient and tried to fast-forward, but actually paying attention did help considerably (as did not getting myself blinded in a random battle immediately before meeting the Queen).
Took you that long to figure it out?
Oh crap, this guy?
Oh crap!
...in a fire? With fragments of crystal embedded in the walls? I guess we'll never know!
...how did we get into the castle?!
We high-tail it out of the castle - ignoring most of the monsters-in-boxes that are now accessible - and, predictably, Karnak explodes. It was only a matter of time, I suppose.
Now what did we just unlock?
None of which I'll probably be using at all at the moment, since Team I-Kick-Ass-For-The-Lord has been faring quite nicely.
The author's thoughts on Final Fantasy "II" are made quite clear.
Prices so outrageous...they ought to be illegal! (For the customers, not us!) ...*cough*
Things are going to get creepy again, aren't they?
Wonder why I haven't run into anybody going "*sigh* Times are tough."
Hm, so the Queen being alive made Karnak less safe? Or maybe I'm reading too far into it?
Good, I was just checking.
Speaking of checking, let's check in Cid.
Well, I guess it's time to go find this guy's grandson...or whoever the hell he is.
But first, it's time to buy more spells. I pick up Cure2 - the sequel to Cure1 - but realize that with Faith level 1, I can't cast it out of class yet. Come to think of it, the game doesn't really tell you what level a given spell is, so you kind of have to grind until you get to that level to be able to know for sure.
Welp, time to bring back the Churchy Brigade. To the library!
And some of these books are possessed. By who? No idea. But the random scholars running around in the library are kind of creepy; I guess some of them are caricatures of actual manga "fans." The guys on the roof are a lot more sane. The book on the right in this pile actually did have monsters in it, as do the books in the basement (which, according to the random scholars, is where all the hentai is, and they have far more of that than anything else). Since "Jacob" isn't around upstairs, we can only assume he's down below.
I hate darkness effects in SNES games. At least give us a torch or a flashlight or something.
If the NPC dialogue is any indication, he's pissed off that he's now classified as a "Pokémon."
A battle ensues.
And much ass is kicked.
Says you. Now, what to do with our Sweet Catch?
...naaah, too obvious. I'm honestly planning on handling the rest of the library later, so join me then to figure out just what the hell Jacob's doing in this creepy haunted basement of porn. (Hopefully not the obvious.)
Chapter the Fourth: That All Changed When The Fire Nation Attacked
At the end of the previous installment, we had just attempted to vaporize ourselves with a meteor teleport, and wound up...somewhere.
Well, I've got no freakin' clue where this is, so it's time to try out this World Map that Galuf was so fired up about.
Um...okay? I really kind of wish this thing were a little larger, or perhaps had some labels on it that are more visible than the blinking white dots, but at least I'm able to figure out a vague location somewhere to the northwest. We're not in Tycoon anymore, that's for sure. ...wait, where the hell's Tycoon on this map?
Some wandering about leads me to Karnak, the Kingdom of Fire (and totally not the city in Egypt).
And boy, oh boy, does Karnak take its fire seriously.
There is something massively wrong with this town.
Well, time to do what we do at every other place and shop for--
Well, crap. I didn't know buying armor was illegal. Were I a bit younger, I'd probably assume this was the "bad" ending, but a while later of mashing the A button against every wall in my cell results in this creepy old guy with glasses blowing up a wall.
This hack has some strange obsession with death, and the self-administration of such therein. Evidently the party thinks so, too, as they bust out laughing in front of him.
Thank you for that wholly enlightening science lesson, Professor.
Finally, someone notices.
Of course! It all comes back to them! (note: the opinions expressed in this article do not necessarily represent the actual feelings of the author. I hate politics, I really do. =P)
Stilton shows Cid a glowing blue thing.
Our conversation is interrupted by the Minister appearing.
As is typical.
Well, before we go meet Cid, we should go explore the rest of the town that we didn't have the chance to look at before being so rudely arrested.
Uh-oh. But it turns out that's the least of Karnak's problems...
I didn't mean this guy.
...Or this guy.
Enough of this Karnak Castle malarkey. Off to the Steamship!
A convenient excuse.
Always with the monsters.
This comes to mind.
So does this.
Riding conveyor belts is fun and all, but it all has to end eventually, and we have to stop Queen Karnak from stealing Cid's stash, so here we go!
I know, right?
Well, time to do battle!
This battle's not nearly as much of a pain as HeavyP was. I did get my ass kicked maybe once, because I got impatient and tried to fast-forward, but actually paying attention did help considerably (as did not getting myself blinded in a random battle immediately before meeting the Queen).
Took you that long to figure it out?
Oh crap, this guy?
Oh crap!
...in a fire? With fragments of crystal embedded in the walls? I guess we'll never know!
...how did we get into the castle?!
We high-tail it out of the castle - ignoring most of the monsters-in-boxes that are now accessible - and, predictably, Karnak explodes. It was only a matter of time, I suppose.
Now what did we just unlock?
None of which I'll probably be using at all at the moment, since Team I-Kick-Ass-For-The-Lord has been faring quite nicely.
The author's thoughts on Final Fantasy "II" are made quite clear.
Prices so outrageous...they ought to be illegal! (For the customers, not us!) ...*cough*
Things are going to get creepy again, aren't they?
Wonder why I haven't run into anybody going "*sigh* Times are tough."
Hm, so the Queen being alive made Karnak less safe? Or maybe I'm reading too far into it?
Good, I was just checking.
Speaking of checking, let's check in Cid.
Well, I guess it's time to go find this guy's grandson...or whoever the hell he is.
But first, it's time to buy more spells. I pick up Cure2 - the sequel to Cure1 - but realize that with Faith level 1, I can't cast it out of class yet. Come to think of it, the game doesn't really tell you what level a given spell is, so you kind of have to grind until you get to that level to be able to know for sure.
Welp, time to bring back the Churchy Brigade. To the library!
And some of these books are possessed. By who? No idea. But the random scholars running around in the library are kind of creepy; I guess some of them are caricatures of actual manga "fans." The guys on the roof are a lot more sane. The book on the right in this pile actually did have monsters in it, as do the books in the basement (which, according to the random scholars, is where all the hentai is, and they have far more of that than anything else). Since "Jacob" isn't around upstairs, we can only assume he's down below.
I hate darkness effects in SNES games. At least give us a torch or a flashlight or something.
If the NPC dialogue is any indication, he's pissed off that he's now classified as a "Pokémon."
A battle ensues.
And much ass is kicked.
Says you. Now, what to do with our Sweet Catch?
...naaah, too obvious. I'm honestly planning on handling the rest of the library later, so join me then to figure out just what the hell Jacob's doing in this creepy haunted basement of porn. (Hopefully not the obvious.)
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